You remember Patsy, don’t you? My hairdresser? Well, she recently went in for a hysterectomy. I guess she was due to have it for some time. Still, it was a shock. Nowadays, where most surgeries are laparoscopic, this one is still the old fashioned kind, with cutting and weeks of recovery. I mean, anytime they let you stay overnight in the hospital, you know it’s serious!

We had a little get-together to celebrate my sister Irene’s birthday last week, just the family. If you’re not going to spring clean, the next best thing is to have a party at your house. They say you should have two a year: one in the warm weather and one in cool. That way, you’re motivated to do a couple of good, deep cleanings, and get your yard in order, to boot.

Well, Charlie and me went to Bangor to see the new “Robin Hood” movie this weekend, you know, the one with Russell Crowe. See, Charlie’s kind of partial to them “hand to hand combat” movies, and I have a thing for Russell Crowe. You throw in dinner at the Olive Garden beforehand, and it’s a win/win for both of us.

Well, I just finished my birthday week. Actually I celebrate the whole month, but the week of is especially festive.

Well, it’s official. For the third year in a row, Mahoosuc Mills is number one in the Franklin County Town Employees Bowling League. In fact, we’ve been in the top three for a couple of decades now. That’s because we have a bona fide ringer on our team: Sadie Dupris, our town librarian. You’ve heard of Minnesota Fats? Well, we call her Virginia Slims. She’s that good!

If middle-aged women went on strike, the world would stop moving, the sun would fall from the sky and Satan would be practicing triple axels in hell. Am I right? We are the last line of defense against complete and utter chaos, and nobody knows it (except, of course, other middle-aged women).

Mahoosuc Mills is one hot bed of activity, and last week was no exception. At the monthly meeting of the Mahoosuc Mills Historical Society, we had a special guest speaker: the president of the New England Moxie Congress, Merrill Lewis! This caused quite a stir, as you can imagine. After all, Moxie is Maine’s official soft drink. No kidding! Governor Baldacci signed a bill proclaiming it so back in 2005. Course, if you grew up in Maine, you’ve known that all along.

Spring has finally sprung here in Mahoosuc Mills. You know what that means, don’t you? Yard sale season is upon us. Hallelujah! I can’t wait to get out there and see what everyone’s getting rid of! And how organized they are.

It’s been a week, and I’m still thinking about Easter. It was such a beautiful day here in Mahoosuc Mills: the kind of Spring day I just prayed for as a kid. Not so the Easter Bunny wouldn’t have to hop, hop, hop through the snow. No, I prayed for good weather so I could wear my new Easter dress with white ankle socks, white patent leather shoes, my pink Easter coat (my sister Irene’s was identical, but blue), white straw hat with fake flowers, and white gloves. All brand, spanking new, toute le kit! Oh, and new underwear, too. Almost forgot about that.

As I write this, Charlie is in the den, lying on the couch, with his knee propped up, remote in hand, moaning. He’s in pain, but keeps “forgetting” to take his ibuprofen, so I have to remind him every four hours. I’m trying to muster up a little sympathy, but it’s hard, considering the circumstances.