Todd Palin was in Maine this past week.

Sarah Palin will be here this week.

Todd, the husband of the governor of Alaska (although he prefers to be called “First Dude”), made stops in Palmyra, Hermon and Presque Isle to campaign for the Republican presidential ticket. He said Maine was a lot like Alaska, only with better foliage. He

You’ve got to wonder what former Maine Gov. Angus King has been drinking. King and his partners in Independence Wind LLC are offering everybody in Roxbury free electricity.

Of course, there’s a catch. To get the power, everybody in Roxbury will have to chug a large bottle of Allen’s Coffee Flavored Brandy.

Ha, ha. That last sentence is completely false.

There weren’t any earthquakes in Maine this past week. No tidal waves. Hurricane Kyle brushed the down-east coast, but it wasn’t as if it made any permanent alterations in the topography.

So, I’m not sure what natural force was to blame for this headline in the Sept. 24 Lewiston Sun Journal:
“Auburn

You must be at least this tall to read this article.

Do not stand up while reading.

Not responsible for objects left between paragraphs.

Every third or fourth sentence should be disregarded as a blatant fabrication.

You’ve been warned.

We’ll begin with a gradual climb, not too steep, not too high. Attendance at Acadia National Park was up this year over 2007, reaching 2.2 million visitors.

That’s

Tinfoil on the windows. Check.

Shotgun by the front door. Check.

Encryption devices on the phone, computer and TV. Check.

Just getting ready for another day in Maine, the 12th most neurotic state in the nation, according to Perspectives on Psychological Science.

The magazine’s online survey of over 3,500 Mainers indicated we’re unfriendly, untrusting, ill-behaved

I am not bitter about the just-concluded season of the Portland Sea Dogs. It doesn’t bother me that Bryce Cox took the mound for the Double-A affiliate of the Boston Red Sox in the eighth inning of the Sept. 5 playoff game against the Trenton Thunder and pitched like he was wearing a blindfold.

When he walked in the tying run, that wasn’t me booing.

An inning later, Dogs reliever Miguel Asencio loaded the bases before hitting a batter to plate the go-ahead run.

That

It was not a good week for people who work in Maine’s paper industry. On Aug. 25, Wausau Paper announced it was permanently closing one of its two machines at the Otis mill in Jay. Nearly 150 of the 235 people employed there will lose their jobs by the end of the year.

There are certain subjects that cannot be satirized on a respectable Web site such as this one. Religion, for one. Ethnic groups, for another. And, of course, the Farmers’ Almanac. So, if my tone seems unusually respectful this week, it’s not because I’ve lost my edge. It’s just that I don’t want to lose my job.

(Although, maybe I won’t have to clean up my act, after all. I’ve always suspected nobody in management actually reads this blog.

I like Bar Harbor. It has that ocean thing going on. Atlantic, I think. And there’s the big outdoor Acadia whatsit. But mostly when I visit, I hang out, depending on my mood, at the Lompoc Café (“poetry is dead, but bocce is alive”), the Thirsty Whale (“poetry is dead, but NASCAR is alive”) or Geddy’s Pub (“I think I’m dead – get me a Bloody Mary”). Perhaps anticipating that potential customers traveling on their hands and knees

There’s plenty of reasons to be annoyed at Eurasians. Their culture is older than ours. Their money is worth more than ours. They can’t make up their minds which continent they live on. And their milfoil is more invasive than ours.

On Aug. 1, Eurasian milfoil was discovered in Salmon Lake in North Belgrade.

It’s only the second time that plant, described by state officials